Believing in Bioplasticity — Persistent Pain Recovery Part Two

Whenever I break out into a run the dogs do too! Even 14 year-old Indie. Wheeee!

“It must be fully realized from the start that the learning process is irregular and consists of steps, and that there will be downs as well as ups. We must not become discouraged therefore, if we find we have slipped back to the original condition at any time; these regressions will become rarer and return to the improved condition easier as the learning process continues.” — Moshe Feldenkrais, from the preface to Awareness Through Movement.

I’m one month, and eight walk/runs into my adventure with more movement. Recovery from persistent pain (which is essentially a sensitized neuroimmune system) is not a linear process and MANY things can influence pain. There are always many contributors to anyone’s pain. “You will have pain when your brain concludes that there is more credible evidence of danger (threat) related to your body than there is credible evidence of safety related to your body.” — Noigroup’s Explain Pain Handbook Protectometer. Pain is entirely about protection of the organism (me!). Out of the seven times I’ve run I’ve only had two major, horribly intense flare ups of pain so far, and those are part of recovery. Challenging my system to running slowly, using Graded Exposure, my system is getting the message that it’s safe! Our systems are built to adapt! We are bioplastic! One of THE most certain things about all living organisms is that we adapt. Plants adapt. Animals adapt. We ALL adapt, and it’s our whole system. This is what pain scientists refer to as bioplasticity (plastic brain and plastic body). By slow exposure to movement, my system will adjust — my system will learn by doing. It is possible to retrain my sensitized system and recover :)

Problem is, us humans can accidentally get in the way of the body, the system, figuring it out. This ‘getting in the way’ can happen in many ways, and these dangers or threats are what Lorimer Moseley (Noigroup) calls DIMs (DIM stands for Danger in Me). DIMs are anything that is dangerous to my body tissues, life, lifestyle, job, happiness, my day to day function — a threat to who I am as a whole person (the whole Soma in Hanna Somatics terms). The seven DIMs are: Things I hear, see, smell, taste and touch, things I say, places I go, things happening in my body, things I do, things I think and believe and people in my life (this is the biopsychosocial model— MANY factors influence pain). To find my DIMs, I need to ask myself, “What are the things in life that are worrying or threatening?” There are SIMs too (Safety in Me) – seeking ways to feel safe is a huge part of this too (another post to come on those!)

Self-reflection is an enormous part of the healing process, which is partly why I’m writing this blog. Note that in the above DIMs categories, some things I am able to control/influence, but some are more difficult, as humans have sub-cortical reflexive patterns of protection and (strong habits too!) However, a huge epiphany came a few weeks ago in a Somatics class that I was participating in, not teaching. Greg and I had discussed that it would be good for me to JUST MOVE, without paying close attention to internal sensations (as we do in Somatics). Hmmm! As my teacher started cueing the movements, before I even moved, I realized my nervous system was already on high alert, hyper-vigilantly looking out for possible threats that could cause damage or that were sub-optimal. As we’ve discussed in class before, it’s ‘What happens before we move.’ I realized my system was taking cues such as “Is the back of the neck long?” and “Is the lower back arching?” as THREATS or DIMs — my system was so on edge it had interpreted these suggestions as things that could be harmful (an arched neck or low back). Even though in Somatics we’re not trying to get it right (there is no ‘right’ way to move, we’re just looking for better choices in how to move) my system had immediately become on edge, sensing possible danger. Eyeopening!!

So, I opened my eyes, remembered my intention of moving with fun, play and frivolity, an “I don’t care, I’m safe!” attitude and this totally changed my experience! Opening my eyes made things feel safe, less intense, and I explored the whole class with a new spirit of adventure, just moving! I trusted my system to self-organize. Way less caution and scrutiny and a lot more pleasure. It felt really liberating to have discovered this. I explored huge movements in the Side Sweep (rotation) movement, just for fun! Wheee! I’ve identified the DIMs in this case as things I heard, things (potentially) happening in my body, and things I thought and believed (my system anticipated the movement to be harmful and dangerous, even before I moved).

I felt great after that class! It was incredible to understand the subtlety of what was happening. Ironically, my system was, beneath my level of consciousness, holding me captive, frightened to move, should I (GASP!) have my back or neck too arched (LIFE THREATENING!) Full of FEAR. It’s so paradoxical. In the very classes that we are exploring how to move beyond our movement habits and expand our choices in how we move, my system was holding me back out of fear and protection. Thank you beautiful nervous system, but I choose to move beyond THAT habit!

Greg and I had discussed how stress, worry and fear are biggies that get in the way of recovery. Discovering the intricacies of these is the key. It’s all part of the process. As Greg says: “The body is self-organizing. We just need to put it in an environment where it can figure things out on its own.” That is, I can learn to get out of my own way! Movement is medicine. ALL movements are on the table! I don’t have to be perfect to be pain free! To quote Feldenkrais again “Striving for a goal reduces the incentive to learn.” My task is to remove all the things I’m trying to do to subconsciously ‘fix’ myself and believe in my system’s amazing capacity for bioplasticity.

This is just one example of my system’s deep-rooted, mostly subconscious, fear of movement, however. Losing my deep, primeval fear of movement will be a long process, but I’m in for the ride. The best thing I can do is move — that’w what humans are designed to do! Understanding pain and retraining my system works. There will be many, many unhelpful habits to uncover along the way and fun new ways to move! The more I move, the more my system will adapt and the more I’ll believe that I CAN DO IT. One last thing — the irony that I am a movement teacher is not lost on me! It will only make me a better teacher :)

Believing in Bioplasticity — Persistent Pain Recovery Part Two

Finding my Feet

“For proper functioning, all nervous structure needs full activity followed by full rest.” — Moshe Feldenkrais